Thursday, April 20, 2006

Continuing with the previous post...
I begin to wonder
*How have all the generations that have come so far, been here without going back
- Are you greedy for the green?
*Haven't you ever given a thought of going back home?
-Don't give me a trite reason as to "Ohh..I have bought a home here"
*Have you not given one thought about people whom you love?
-Don't give me another hackneyed reason "I plan to bring them here for the rest of their lives". That ain't going to be possible. I am pretty much sure they won't get to adapt to this lifestyle for the rest of their lives though, they would not show that out.
*What is the one good reason for you to stay here?
-I almost answer this myself. "My parents want me to be happy wherever I am. And this is where I am the most happiest" Are you being self centered? Don't you care about what they would feel deep inside? They would want you to be beside them all the way long.
*Does a marriage make a difference in your opinion?
-Ofcourse. It does. You cannot always take your own decisions. You will have to get your other half's opinion as well. But then, either the final decision would be one that would be taken on the same level where both of you are a part of all of these characteristics above, else your other half is submissive enough to follow you all along.

In this post, I have mentioned "You" and not myself. In the end, I myself feel guilty.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

its de TRUTH dat still remains unaccepted.....hope to see u back home....

April 23, 2006 10:21 AM  
Blogger Vikram Prasad said...

Like I mentioned previously..anonymous..time would tell. Right now, there are too many conflicting thoughts running through my mind. I hope whatever decision I make, stands out as fair.

April 23, 2006 11:15 AM  
Anonymous dinesh n m said...

Have you decided on your memorial day weekend trip?

April 29, 2006 8:24 AM  
Blogger Vikram Prasad said...

We have booked tics to Orlando for memorial day. Are you guys coming here to Boston?

April 30, 2006 6:36 PM  
Anonymous Pradeep Selvaraj said...

I'd decided not to comment on this blog of yours, but since you wanted me to.... here you go.

*How have all the generations that have come so far, been here without going back
- Are you greedy for the green?
*Haven't you ever given a thought of going back home?
*Have you not given one thought about people whom you love?

Before I address these questions- let me ask you this first.. If you are in this same situation 5-7 years ago, and things were the same back home as it were 5-7 years ago, would you ask the same question. I betcha you would'nt be giving it the same serious thought as you are now. The difference is much more than money. It is QUALITY OF LIFE. 5-7 years ago, quality of life here was much better compared to things back home. With outsourcing triggering rapid development, things have improved a tremendously lot. Better jobs, better career, better opportunities, better education, better recognition for talent, ofcourse better pay, attitudinal changes from a conservative to an open minded nature in most people. Look at the students in colleges now, look at the people graduating these days... they are a completely new generation. You cannot deny the difference.

So, what made people stay? Is it the green..? is it because they bought a home..?
Absolutely NO. These are totally shallow reasons. It hurts to see you mention it even after being here, seen people, having had a chance to learn their backgrounds.

MOST people who came and settled here were from middle class. They came here to improve the quality of life, not just for themselves -but for the rest of their families back home. An elder brother/sister in a middle class family came here so he could send his younger brother to a good school/college, to make sure his sister gets settled in a good family with a great life, to help his parents rest with all comforts after their retirement, to build a better home for his family back home. You can imagine how much it hurts to be away from the family now... they had to bear much more of it. Technology has brought today's world much closer -a phone call to India now costs 10c/min, 2 yrs back it was more than 40-50 c/min. Flights are quicker and much cheaper these days than they were a few years ago. Its easy to make a comment that the greed made them stay here - but they had to bear the pain of staying away from their families, attending to their families, participating in everyday celebrations, festivals with their families only to ensure that their families have a better tomorrow. Parents & families back home on the other hand, wanted their children to have a better quality of life here so they didnt force them to come back.

Think about it, it is because of these guys that the world now recognizes the talent of Indians.

Everybody who comes here says- I will make enough money or experience and go back. I strongly believe that is a genuine statement - true intentions. But it takes years to gain the experience, earn the money enough to support yourself and your family back home. People get married and have a family here. Now there probably was a another decision to make - with socio-economic conditions and the quality of life back home not being so great, do you want to take your new family back home and put them through it, when they have a good life here now. Another sacrifice.

These days you see a lot of people returning home after graduation or after a couple of years of work experience. Its easy to make that decision because of the changes and the great opportunities back home.

I hope to return some day too.

- Pradeep Selvaraj

May 06, 2006 10:35 PM  
Blogger Vikram Prasad said...


Thanks for the comments. What you say really makes a lot of sense. Actually, myself and JC were pondering on this issue for quite a while, but we chose not to think from this perspective. Though your comments seem to have a lot of thought, it still does not convince me..rather expose me to what I am looking for. I hope to return someday too.

May 06, 2006 11:45 PM  
Anonymous Pradeep Selvaraj said...

Chose not to think from this perspective? How could you pose a question when you chose to ignore the answer and claim to be unconviced?
At the very least, I expect some reasoning as to why JC & you would chose to ignore this perspective.

May 07, 2006 10:09 AM  
Blogger Vikram Prasad said...


"How could you pose a question when you chose to ignore the answer and claim to be unconviced?"

I never mentioned that your answer was what I was looking for. Your answer is one of the elements that gives credence to the question posted. There is still a lot of soul searching to do. This is not an easy question to think about an answer. You speak from "the millions who are here" point's of view. I totally agree with the conditions in India changing drastically in recent years for people going back. But leaving behind loads of people you love for the sake of making money does not sound so good to me.

May 07, 2006 3:09 PM  
Anonymous Ajay said...

It is a combination of everything. “Good Quality of life” is what people say when they are asked why they have not gone home. Is that a plausible response? YES…Absolutely. But, how do you get this so called good quality of life? Does it appear all of a sudden like magic? NO. Does Money play a role? YES…Absolutely.

Let me give an example from my life. When I was about to graduate from University of Texas at Arlington (UTA), I used to clean dishes in the cafeteria. I did not mind doing that job as it was paying my living expenses. But my quality of life was bad and I was ready to go back home if I did not get a regular full time job. But fate intervened, and I came to Penn State to do my PhD. After the first couple of months, when my finances started improving I could afford to buy a couple of things that I wouldn’t have dreamt of if I was doing the cafeteria job. I could go out with friends without worrying about money. My social life improved. In short my quality of life improved. And after about 15 months in Penn State I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go home as desperately as I did when I was in UTA. And now, I am not even sure if I want to go home anymore.

It is obvious from the previous paragraph that money is related to the quality of life. Money plays a significant factor in the decision as to whether to stay in the US or not and it is by no means a shallow reason. Thus, when people mention that they stay in the US as their quality of life is good, they implicitly state that they are making enough money.

Now that I have clarified that money is directly proportional to the quality of life, I will jump to another issue that was also touched upon: The quality of life back home. With the recent boom in India’s economy, people are managing to find jobs that pay them a lot more money than before and hence, the quality of life (for the educated class of people) has improved drastically. Isn’t that a good enough reason for us to go back home? With our education background we can get good jobs, make money, be with our family etc. We really don’t have to sacrifice anything anymore. Sounds like an interesting proposition. Why aren’t we then going back home? I think there is more to it than making/saving money and gaining experience, because you are going to achieve the same thing once you go back home.

I think it would be worthwhile to ponder about this issue. I do have an answer but it is from my perspective and it will address the first sentence in the first paragraph and the last sentence in the second paragraph. But since this is Vikram’s BLOG, he has to decide upon whether he is willing to start this as the next topic of discussion

May 07, 2006 3:18 PM  

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